Posts by RULES & REGULATIONS

family reunion of jw carts gathering together for missionary work, some people waste their time in liberia trying to help ebola victims, jehovah's organization spends all their time focused on meaningful endeavors by bringing them salvation.

pusher said "why bother helping when people are going to die anyway, focus on the big picture (joining jehovah's organization is the only way to eliminate homelessness, hunger and global issues", doctors waste their time in west africa when they could be pushing carts with literature and books, that's real healing", i still don't understand why we can't help the poor and sick but than again, i am just a jw cart!.

RULES & REGULATIONS

JWCART

That is some great satire!

If you are Aunt Connie ( who I found to be funny and annoying ) please try a little harder with your funny satire without the annoyance!

31

Excuses to miss the meeting that won't raise suspicion of a fade

by kairos in

jw
friends

the first step to fading is to begin missing the meetings.. "if" anyone misses you, a quality excuse must be at the ready.

this will produce empathy toward you as opposed to suspicion.. 1. car problems ( don't mention that you caused them ).

2. stuck on the phone resolving insurance, billing, etc issues.. 3. sick ( of the meetings ).

RULES & REGULATIONS

I cant come to the meeting today because the city is paving my street and I cant get out!

My car ran out of gas on the way to the meeting. I was pushing it to a gas station and I got a stomach hernia and I now have to go to the doctors.

I just played golf and I do not feel up to par today.

I have a possum in my backyard and it's freaking out my dog. I have to get it out before I can leave.

9

Super Pioneer?

by nonjwspouse in

the was just recently posted.

surely this is complete satire.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hknzmr5lcc0.

RULES & REGULATIONS

Next video

Super Pioneer will : do the Pioneer Shuffle ( where he walks at a snails pace instead of running )

drive in a four door car

waste time with a two hour lunch and coffee break

drive for two hours in rural districts looking for that one return visit

2

Simon : What computer program do you use to move topics around and how much time each topic receives?

by RULES & REGULATIONS in

i'm no computer programmer and have lots of admiration for people who do.

i would like to know.. where is the edit button?

it never shows up on my new topic posting.

RULES & REGULATIONS

The edit button never shows up under my post. Not being so great in typing and editing, I need the edit button to show everyone my great American education.

2

Simon : What computer program do you use to move topics around and how much time each topic receives?

by RULES & REGULATIONS in

i'm no computer programmer and have lots of admiration for people who do.

i would like to know.. where is the edit button?

it never shows up on my new topic posting.

RULES & REGULATIONS

I'm no computer programmer and have lots of admiration for people who do.

I would like to know.. where is the edit button? It never shows up on my new topic posting.

And what program do you use to move topics around?

27

Did You Know Any Bad JWs?

by minimus in

jw
friends

over the years, i knew some individuals that were pretty bad witnesses.

they broke more commandments that most.

RULES & REGULATIONS

My congregation had :

Brothers who cheated on their wives, divorced and never paid child support. The wives took them to court and still couldn't make them pay.

A brother who owned a business that was closed by the state due to multiple complaints from customers and his employees. He left real quick to Florida and started the same kind of business there. Five years later he returns back home.

An Elder who would lay his hands on his wife (who never reported anything because of fear ).

A brother who went to rough up one of his workers who was stealing his equipment.

A brother who went to jail for selling drugs. He was still baptized and still going to the meetings when caught.

An brother ( who was owed money from a customer ) told me that if this customer didn't pay soon, he was going to burn his his lawn with gas. ( I don't think he ever did )

A brother who borrowed money from his father-in-law Elder and never paid in back. They never spoke to each other and the brother left to attend another congregation.

My cousin ( who loved expensive suits ) brought his new suit to the meeting because he had no time to go home. He left the expensive suit on the coat rack during the meeting. He forgot the suit at the Kingdom Hall overnight. The next day he shows up at the Kingdom Hall while another congregation was having their meeting and looks for his suit. It was gone. Someone took the suit.

38

What is the main reason the Watchtower Society baptize their children so young?

by RULES & REGULATIONS in

jesus was thirty was he was baptized.

today, you hear of young children getting baptized as young as 10 years old.

the parents, family and congregation think it's a wonderful idea that someone dedicates their life to jehovah at such a young age.

RULES & REGULATIONS

EndofMysteries said:2 hours ago

They do it because the rules are they don't have to shun if they were never baptized, and they know many are waking up younger and want them baptized before they can really think and know what's going on and find out about the lies so when they inevitably do, then they can make their parents shun them and not risk them learning TTATT.

That's it right there! I have a cousin who was baptized at 15 years of age. He was disfellowshipped for fornication years later and is shunned to this day. His sister ( who was never baptized and quit attending all meetings) has no problems talking and being in the same room with any Jehovah's Witness because she was never baptized.

38

What is the main reason the Watchtower Society baptize their children so young?

by RULES & REGULATIONS in

jesus was thirty was he was baptized.

today, you hear of young children getting baptized as young as 10 years old.

the parents, family and congregation think it's a wonderful idea that someone dedicates their life to jehovah at such a young age.

RULES & REGULATIONS

ShirleyW said:

so basically they just signed a contract with Jah to be his faithful servant when they obviously don't have the full understanding of what that includes.

The bait and switch! Pretend that they will serve Jehovah when in reality you will serve a human corporation whose whole objective is to sell magazines and books.